The Rich Hire Disabled People to Cut In Line at Disney World

This should be illegal.

The New York Post just exposed a story that would make even China’s exploited slaves’ stomachs turn. Today we learned that wealthy mothers in Manhattan are bypassing the long lines at Disney World by hiring disabled people to act as members of their family. Dr. Wednesday Martin, the social anthropologist who uncovered the awful scam, found that moms are gaining access to “black market Disney guides” through a service called Dream Tours Florida.

Throughout New York City’s most exclusive private schools, brazen families are paying $130 an hour, or $1,040 for an eight-hour day, to be accompanied by someone who is disabled. Obtaining front of the line privileges has become kind of a secret underground business and the service even requires that you be referred by someone.

“It’s insider knowledge that very few have and share carefully,” said Dr. Martin, who uncovered the swindling taking place while doing research for her upcoming book Primates of Park Avenue. The book  reveals the constant pressures, mysteries, and rivalry among mothers in Manhattan.

One anonymous mother even claims that a man named Ryan Clement, the owner of Dream Tours Florida, escorted her, her husband, their 1-year-old son and their 5-year-old daughter through the park in a motorized scooter with a “handicapped” sign on it. Her family was sent straight to an secondary entrance at the front of each attraction. Disney apparently allows each guest who needs a special accommodations to bring up to six guests to a “more convenient entrance.”

“You can’t go to Disney without a tour concierge,’’ she confessed. “This is how the one percent does Disney. My daughter waited one minute to get on It’s a Small World, while the other kids had to wait two and a half hours.” According to several of these elite parents, utilizing the company’s services was more efficient and less expensive than opting for Disney Tours’ VIP guide or fast passes ($310 to $380 per hour).

“Who wants a speed pass when you can use your black-market handicapped guide to circumvent the lines all together?” Dr. Martin continued.

Average families who visit the popular theme park are typically so concerned about the overpriced tourist-trap that Disney World has become, with the “brainwashed” attitudes of its employees and steep charges for food, that they don’t have the time to consider taking advantage of such a despicable service.

For how many times you’ll hear “have a magical day” or “it’s just the Disney way” while roaming through the park, after hearing this story — there’s nothing magical about the place.

Of course, Disney never returned any requests for comments on the issue.