Truth About Woman Arrested for Using a Sausage to Pleasure Herself in Walmart Bathroom

WARNING: Needless to say, the contents of this article are not suitable for all readers.

Just when you thought you’d escaped the week from crazy stories, Now8News released a report of a woman who was allegedly arrested for masturbating in a Walmart restroom using a Jimmy Dean sausage she picked up from the grocery aisle.

Supposedly the store’s security cameras filmed 33-year-old Shaniqua Johnson shoving sausages under her shirt before she disappeared into the women’s bathroom. Then a male security guard entered to see what was happening. They state:

What he found behind the door of the unlocked stall is something he said will “haunt his dreams forever.” The security guard reports when he entered the stall, Johnson was inappropriately pleasing herself with a Jimmy Dean package of sausage. He said that when he entered “She didn’t even stop. She just stared at me and kept going.”

Shocked, and also frightened for his safety due to the fact that Johnson is a “big girl,” the 140 pound security guard said he ran out until police arrived.

It doesn’t take a detective to tell you that this is a fake story. From the racial stereotype of calling an African American woman Shaniqua, to a male security guard entering a women’s restroom — an act Walmart would never allow due to the legal implications — it’s clear that this is a bogus story. Plus, this comes from Now8News, which is a known bogus news site that often reports about crazy stories, many of which happen at a Walmart. In fact, we recently debunked their story about a woman who was arrested at a Walmart for allegedly sampling tampons in the feminine hygiene aisle. even reports:

A day after the Now8News article was published, the disreputable Prntly web site regurgitated the story using the same premise and photograph but changing several details, stating that the incident occurred in New York not Louisiana, that the phallic food was a Johnsonville Brand Sausage and not a Jimmy Dean sausage, and that the store involved was a Price Chopper and not a WalMart. Why the discrepancy? It might have something to do with the fact that both stories were completely made up.

Who Is the Woman in This Photo?

We don’t know much, but we do believe this is an actual mugshot — mainly because she appears in a number of “craziest mugshot” posts over the web. The most legitimate source is the Miami New Times, which reports that she was arrested on 12/12/2010 for grand theft. No name is given.

Moral to this story? When you’re friends post stuff from Now8News, don’t believe it unless you find the same story on a more reputable website.